Finally some discussion
I appreciate your input very much c4p0ne, as well as other's suggestions. I might even give sygate a second chance... I dumped my blackice because it was too ressource-intensive and decided to stick with Outpost for now. Only bad part is, well, it stopped working... My system is really broken, but after a format it should all be ok.
As you also suggested to turn of AP in blackice, it's the first thing I did after installing it
It's that stupid element of the firewall that makes the installation last like 30 minutes and eat up even more ressources!
As for the IDS, let me take a look at snort - if I combine that with an existing firewall, it can provide just the thing I need! As for dropping IIS, I am reluctant to do so... I have my own reasons. What I would really like is to log all attacks, not necessarily block them 100%, but log so I can study them and see what the person tried and why... As for dropping asp, I don't even know the language yet, although it shouldn't be that different from vb, and I do all my server-side scripting in php
Great language might I add.